Question

How do you justify working when your paycheck doesn’t cover your bills and childcare? Really the childcare is what the problem is. Usually we pay $160/week for after school, but in the summer if we go back to work I might be paying $300+/week. I’m constantly worrying about stuff so this is hypothetical, but I like to have plans placed for the future what if’s, hoping they don’t happen  

Answer 1

Most of us don't. Becoming a stay at home parent is incredibly challenging, in so many ways. But the cost of childcare often makes it impossible to return to work, especially as you add in more children.  

Comments

@hysterectomize I stayed at home for 6 months and only have 1 child and went a little crazy so I got another job and he went back to daycare until he started school now it’s just after school care.  

Answer 2

I justified working as my employer offers 401k and other benefits that would help my retirement and it provided my kids a chance to socialize as well as myself to not become stir crazy by being in the house all day.  

Answer 3

I found myself in the same situation and ended up staying home for a few years, working on the weekends for extra spending money.  

Answer 4

While I’m finishing my degree I’m home. Not just for the cost of childcare, but because my husband is in law enforcement and constantly doing overtime or getting called in on his days off. I have to be the one to be able to leave if the kids are sick, or someone forgets something. He can’t. Plus he makes what I would in a paycheck, in two days of overtime. I also feel it’s situational.  

Comments

@plicate300 Same, girl. Except (minus the lockdown) I went back to work only because we have a wedding to pay for and some debt to payoff. Then I'm going down to 2 weeks. Police wife life is tough sometimes! We never have a schedule  

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@plicate300 thank you to your family  first responders are so important to our community  and you are a rockstar for being that rock! Totally get the situational thing, that’s were I’m getting hung up right now.  

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@portaltoportal thank you for your family! First responders are so important  

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@portaltoportal this life is so tough some days! I appreciate what he does but man, being the primary everything is tiring. And I’m over the “where’s your husband? ” Question  

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@trachoma thank you! You’re amazing I super appreciate that and I know he will too! Honestly I feel like if it’s going to help you out financially and help you out mentally then take the plunge and go for it! ❤️ and if it doesn’t leave you guys strapped for cash then I say yes!  

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The last comment was from my two year old  never leave your phone unattended  

Answer 5

The 401k, insurance and all other benefits offered by my employer is a huge help to our family. Yes, the child care in the summer is huge (we have three kids), but that is just for about 12 weeks out of the year so I can’t justify not working just for that. I save throughout the year in order to budget the extra childcare costs. We pay $216/week during the school year and $400/week in the summer.  

Comments

Plus my mental health!  

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@plicate300 Kuhs totally get all that! I only have one child, we just live in an astronomically high cost area so the costs for everything are overwhelming  

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@trachoma I forgot to mention that I’m in Arkansas so I know that plays in to it. Our cost of living is lower than some places.  

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@plicate300 Kuhs I also think it’s justifiable when you like your job! But cost of living has been a big factor in our decisions for this time period of our lives. I can’t wait to move  

Answer 6

I started doing daycare in my home so I could still raise my kids. I am on 3 years now I will have my associate's degree on sat (or whenever they mail it to me lll

Answer 7

Social security

Answer 8

We sort of just decided it would be more beneficial for our son to be put in a preschool. It is Montessori so it’s a little more but it will be so good for us. We’re signed up to do 5 days a week since I’ll be in school full time and working starting August. I need the time to do my work and he needs the time to learn to be healthily independent from mama

Comments

Right now my mom/nana watch him and it’s fine because it’s free but the older he gets the more he needs learning wise.  

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@neighbor for sure! Our son has been in daycare since 6 weeks old except for a 6 month break 2 years ago  

Answer 9

My husband is the breadwinner, by far, but I work in government, so I have a pension and carry our health insurance (he's self employed so we can't get it through his work), so as much as I'd love to stay home with my kids, I don't have much choice.  

Answer 10

When you say “your paycheck”. is that yours alone or collective household? I don’t know how I would justify working if it meant it would put me in debt.  

Comments

@dowsabel my paycheck, we have a weird situation as my fiancé is in dental school. We are in tons of debt and I seem to always come up with the money, we don’t have credit card debt. I only have student loans. I still need to make money just not sure how to justify my specific job I guess as I get paid absolute garbage money for our area.  

Answer 11

I don’t understand-if you didn’t work could you cover the bills?  

Comments

@sazerac9685 definitely phrased poorly. I don’t think I could just not work in general, but I don’t know I can justify working a typical 9-5 and childcare at $300+/week. Also was just wondering how others are juggling it all.  

Answer 12

I’m in that same situation. This is why I’m a SAHM. 380 a week for childcare? I would only work to pay the daycare.  

Comments

@schach that is high! Yes that would be so difficult! Do you work on the side at all?  

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@trachoma I sometimes work as a Substitute. Only when a family member is available to care for my 15month old baby.  

Answer 13

I think it depends what all goes into it. Would you have benefits? My husband's take home is just over daycare for 2 weeks if he doesn't work OT. However, all of our insurance, health FSA, and dependent care FSA comes out of his check. If he quit working, then my check wouldn't be able to cover everything including all of the things his check covers.  

Comments

@shirberg yes, this is part of my problem too! Through my work insurance it’s just me, if I have to add anyone it will significantly raise the cost which is also a concern.  

Answer 14

I'd ask if you're paying for childcare entirely out of your own paycheck. If you have a partner, half of it should be coming out of their paycheck too. Yes, parents make various payment arrangements. It's just disturbing to me to see women pushed out of the workplace when they need to be working simply because we lay childcare costs entirely at the feet of women, which isn't right.  

Comments

@mapes yes! Thank you!  this drives me crazy.  

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@mapes we have a different financial situation and we have been together for 8 years. I’ve been working the whole time, but in the end he will be paying for far more of our life then I did.  

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@trachoma It's good that you've found a financial arrangement that works for you. But if you're priced out of the workplace by taking on the entire cost of childcare, is it really working? --rhetorical question only. You know your life and what you're doing. I bring this up for anyone who might be in this situation, not singling you out. Sending you support and best wishes.  

Answer 15

I have two kids who are 16 months apart, when they were infant and toddler I paid about $1600 a month for them plus after school for my then 10 year old. My entire net paycheck would go to daycare. The only reason why I still worked was because of the benefits, my insurance was better and cheaper than what my husband’s employer offered. I also made commission so my commission was my take home pay. But I hated that job so I left and went back to school full time. I still needed to make some money so I worked at hr block during tax season, it was awesome because I could work weekends and evenings avoiding paying for daycare. I’m also bilingual so I did interpreting on the side.  

Answer 16

If working is important to you and your mental health I would continue working to your family can afford it! My sisters entire check essentially goes to childcare but that’s temporary until they are old enough for school and she likes to work

Comments

@stuccowork4 love this idea ❤️

Answer 17

There are other considerations besides just a paycheck though. Social security, health benefits, retirement savings, the future earning potential you are losing by giving up 5-10 years of advancement in your career, your purpose, your sanity. I’m fortunate to make a salary that supports working even when I have to pay for daycare, but take home pay isn’t the end all to base the decision on.