Question

Looking for words of encouragement / similar experiences / advice ! a little background - i decided last year that i hate my career and i am going back to school for nursing. my plan was to stay in my career (and keep my good salary) for as long as i can. once i start the program i won’t be able to keep my full time job. ive been working hard to pay down debt and save while i take pre-reqs. so the issue . i hate my job. i am so miserable and my mental health is quickly declining. i have been at this job since september and i didnt think i would make it this long. i have reached my limit of what i can handle on many different levels. my job is very physically and mentally draining. physically - i’m getting beat up daily. i work with highly aggressive kids so i deal with aggression daily and get hurt regularly. i also have to use physical restraints daily. mentally - my boss is awful. i have gone to HR and everyone knows she is a problem but things wont change. i am losing it. i cry daily and constantly have stomach aches and migraines. anxiety is high at all times. ive woken up in the middle of the night from panic attacks. it is effecting my life and my relationships. my struggle is finding a job that will pay me enough. i have a decent salary and high student loans and im trying to cash flow nursing school. as like minded budget people . would you put mental health aside to keep the salary? or figure out the money part to regain some sanity?  

Answer 1

Hi @letha46151, I’m sorry this is your current work situation. I’m not sure where you live but do any of the hospitals have free nursing programs in your area? For me I quit my job and got my nursing assistant license. Started working for s hospital that had a free nursing program and tuition reimbursement. I was able to work full time and attend nursing school. Good luck doll.  

Comments

@rataplan3 unfortunately no  there are only 2 programs near me. one is $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ and the other im going for. i am going to do research with the local hospital and see if any of them offer tuition assistance and/or pay for nursing school

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Are you able to move? That could be an option too. I’m from Dallas. Good luck!  

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@rataplan3 we live with my dad at the moment so we lay very low rent which is helpful right now while i try to figure all this out. we live in NY and living is ungodly here

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Ahhh understandable. My cousin left NY and went to an Adventist college out here in Texas. If you are going to take a loan and not work might as well consider out of state if it’s chesper than NY. Wishing you the best. I pray you are able to leave that job,  

Answer 2

If I were in your shoes, I think I would start by writing everything down to see how you will do financially without your salary. Can you pay for the necessities and support your family? Do you have enough savings to get by for a bit until you can find another way to make money? If you can still keep a roof over your head and put food on the table, then no amount of money is worth being miserable over.  

Comments

@belch69 luckily i dont have a family ahhah no kids at the moment! just 2 low maintenance pups. my boyfriend and i live together but only have rent as a joint expense so im only supporting myself. we also rent from my dad so i know i wont be kicked out over money. my student loans are the biggest expense im concerned about

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@letha46151 it sounds like you’ll be ok for a while then. Your mental health is so important. Take care of yourself and best of luck to you!  

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@letha46151 if you only have to really worry about your student loans have you looked into deferring them while back in school? Then wouldnt have to pay until you're done with nursing school. Btw congrats. I just finished my nursing degree through community college in may and started my job in july!  

Answer 3

Maybe check at a different mental health facility, they are not all bad. Or get a job as in hospital as a nurse assistant or nurse intern while you are going to school. See what type of programs that are offered

Answer 4

We spend so much time at work that it is so important to like your job!  

Answer 5

Mental Health comes first! If you have a strong support system, I would leave that job ASAP. This is coming from someone who knows exactly how you are feeling right now. I worked as a mental health worker/para for 3 years working with kids/teens with behavioral disorders and I got hurt A LOT. When I first started at that job, we had great management which meant happy staff so we were always fully staffed. Once mgmt changed, we were always short staffed which lead to a spike in daily restraints since we didn't have enough staff to manage and redirect behaviors. I have constant back pain due to that job. I quit after 3 years and would never work in a similar position again. I found a job with much better pay. I too am in nursing school and completed all my pre reqs; I'm taking my nurses courses now. I dropped down to 16 hours a week and so far that has been working out. I work as a Care Manager now and absolutely love my job.  

Answer 6

Take care of yourself FIRST. The rest will follow!  

Answer 7

Leave the Job. mental health drain you and stop from you to see things right, you feel no will power to move on and before you know you loosing your health happienes and yourself. Change your story, you are the one who write it and only you can change control where it will lead. Don't let fear or worries stop you to do what feel right for you. Change your thoughts, be proactive and know you worth it. Good luck.  

Answer 8

Just make sure nursing is what you really want to do b/c if you're not looking for physicially and mentally draining, that may not be it :p #ernurse

Comments

@westminster oh im going with physical and mental but at this current job i’m getting frequent concussions lol i dont mind hard work and being tested mentally or physically but there is a line being crossed of abuse from a supervisor that isnt okay

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@westminster truth#icunurse

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@letha46151- if you are getting concussions then your restraint training isn’t adequate. How are you getting them? I do similar work and while concussions can happen- it should be a freak accident if they’ve trained you properly.  

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@shavers the restraint curriculum we use is not adequate for our kids. overall the program sucks and the kids are way too big and strong. they need something more restrictive. i worked in a residential setting for over 3 years and was never once injured. also all the staff are scared so it all falls on me. and i can be as properly trained as possible but i cant do it all on my own

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That needs to have a complaint filed then. If the program isn’t keeping staff safe, it’s also not going to keep kids safe. I’d consider blowing the whistle Don’t your restraints get audited?  

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@shavers yah it is a much larger issue going on. honestly i dont know how this school hasnt been shut down and i need to leave

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If it’s that bad ya- because your name is on those forms- I’d go and blow the whistle. No good is coming from this  

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@shavers ive blown every whistle there is. it is very sad because ive worked so hard and im trying to create change and a positive climate for the staff and kiddos but it is clear the agency does not care. im not sure why but i have given up. i make sure my ps + qs are in order and i wont sign anything im not comfortable with. its been months of going to HR and going to my bosses boss and corporate compliance. now i’m just trying to leave asap ‍♀️

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That’s horrible. I am so sorry.  

Answer 9

No job is worth your mental health period. I wish you all the best.  

Answer 10

I think when you go back to school you have an option to suspend current loan payments. I would chose that over the mental stress, even if it meant more interest accruing

Answer 11

I would focus on your mental health and wellbeing. Don’t carry your current toxic work environment on your shoulders. Nursing school is super stressful and will take up almost all your time. Being a nurse is still stressful, but it becomes more manageable when you find a job in a specialty that you enjoy. It truly is a rewarding career, and there are endless opportunities.  

Answer 12

I just went through almost this exact same situation last year. I worked at an APS Partial Hospitalization program with kids aged 7-12. After a year of being physically abused daily I decided to quit and have spent the past 9 months nannying while I figure out my next move! If you want to chat dm me I totally understand the struggle!  

Comments

@demythologize thanks for the encouragement! i work in a school for kids with autism and its a lot of physical aggression daily  

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@letha46151 it’s really hard and it really puts a strain on you - especially when you feel unsupported from your boss. Mental health > money.