Question

***Update: I called EI yesterday and within a few hours someone called me back and they are mailing me a packet to get the ball rolling! Hooray! Thank you all you wonderful ladies for your responses  (MY HUSBAND WISHES HE WAS A MOMMY SO HE CAN JOIN THIS AWESOME GROUP. He sends his thanks from the bottom of his heart *** Good morning mom’s  I need a little guidance here. My daughter just turned 2 and she doesn’t talk, she babbles, but doesn’t talk. She says papa and mama once and a while. At her last check up we voiced our concerns to her pediatrician and asked him if we should look into speech therapy and he said it would be the worst thing we could do ‍♀️ We have been stressing and for a while we started to think she may be autistic, since that spectrum is so broad we still have that in the back of our minds. My little girl doesn’t do well with any stranger, not even kids when they show interest in her. Just the other night when we all sang happy birthday to her she got really upset and starting hitting her dad. So many little flags popping up. Anyhow, we started speaking amongst ourselves about “early intervention” services, to get her evaluated. Does anyone know if DHS is the only place that can evaluate her? Since their office is closed I can’t ask anyone. Thank you in advance for any guidance you can give. Have a safe and happy day  

Answer 1

Who is your pediatrician? I don’t understand why any pediatrician would say that.  

Comments

First step- new pediatrician

Answer 2

I would definitely get a second opinion other than the pediatrician. Confused as to why they would say speech therapy is the worst thing. It helps a lot of children. Definitely go else where.  

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@sanford44 we were really confused too. We read on some forums that speech therapy can stress a child out even more and delay their speech even more. But we weren’t given a reason as to why not to take her from her pediatrician. Who has been seeing her since she was born. Anyhow we have an appointment with him next week, for her 2 year old checkup, curious to see what he says now.  

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@bitternut I mean I’m not a doctor but I’ve never heard that before. I think it can be difficult, sure but so can school for a child. Honestly I would look into finding a new doctor.  

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@bitternut kids have certain milestones to hit and if something is missing it is a doctors job to realize and find a reason and solution. Usually they ask how many words a child has at that age. A speech therapist help determine why a child isn’t speaking yet and help them learn to.  

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Speech therapy should only help! If it’s a good therapist it won’t stress your daughter out. And if the therapist evaluates your daughter and decides she doesn’t need services, that’s also helpful to you! And they can give you some tips or resources to work with her yourself. There is no reason your doctor should have said that, its unprofessional and inaccurate. (I’m an occupational therapist. )

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@prom33543 that what we thought, especially if some therapist come to your home! The same environment they are used to, it shouldn’t be stressful. You are right, even if they evaluate her and she doesn’t need it and they give me those tips to work at home with her it would be great.  

Answer 3

I don’t know how EI evaluations are working right now. Some private clinics are still open (would likely be more expensive, depending on your insurance). Every child develops at different rates, but we typically expect to hear about 50 words from a 24 month old.  

Answer 4

Early Intervention is provided through the state and typically ends up cheaper. Depending on your insurance you may be able to get speech privately but not sure what that looks like. You can call the service area for Early Intervention. On Des Plaines you would be CFC 6. Feel free to pme I do social work through Early Intervention

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@daggett thank you!  

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@daggett thank you! I also work through CFC6 as a DT.  

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@daggett/activity" class="qa-user-link">daggett I am a DT through CFC 6. feel free to pm me alao. but honestly @daggett/activity" class="qa-user-link">daggett sounds like she got the info to help. The biggest issue is right now initial evals via tele health are being debates at the state level.  

Answer 5

Do you speak 2 languages around her? My MIL watched my nephew and would speak Italian to him, then he got English at home - it delayed his speech till he was about 3

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@hepcat5 actually we do. We are a bi-lingual household. I speak to her in English and Spanish and my husband speaks to her in English mostly.  

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@bitternut that could be it, take a deep breath and maybe pick a few things around the house that you only say in English? I don't know. This was 16 years ago nephew.  

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I forget to breathe all the time. Good idea on picking a few things to only say in English.  

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@bitternut i hear a lot of preschools are quick to want to label kids, which can be great - early interventions. But i think others just need time.  

Answer 6

Look up selective Mutism and anxiety in children. I cant be sure, but she has a lot of the same issues my daughter had at that age. She's 5. 5 now and verbal in many situations, but still mute in others. She has anxiety pretty bad. We do not sing at her birthdays bc it makes her very upset to have that attention on her.  

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@natheless thank you I’ll look into it.  

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@bitternut people used to say my daughter might be autistic but she isn't. We take her to therapy for the anxiety and Mutism and it helps her so much. She's so smart and kind, but we didn't know she had this anxiety disorder til she was about 4! I wish we'd known sooner.  

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@natheless our family Kees telling is that we have to socialize her more, they expect her to warm up to them right away. Although she doesn’t see them but twice a year, if that. But it doesn’t explain the non-verbal in her. I’m so glad you were able to get your little girl what she needed.  

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@bitternut my daughter was in baby music class, gymnastics etc etc. Tons of playdates. It helps, but doesn't change the underlying problem. I hope you get to the root of it and find a treatment plan that works well for you all. Bryan Bugay is a child therapist nearby who takes insurance, if you are interested in getting another opinion.  

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@natheless I agree

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@bitternut I was super quiet even in elementary school. I grew up to realize I'm a total introvert and hated certain situations, going out, being around others that weren't close family. those gave me a ton of anxiety. Now I know so I can manage it better. My mom had no idea. she thought something was wrong esp when I barely made any friends. Worth to check out if you want.  

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@coupe thank you. I definitely want to explore all routes to find out why she won’t talk. We read to her all the time, not just before bed. She actually brings us books throughout the day so we can sit with her and read. When she wants something she makes it known, even by smacking us on the leg to get our attention, but won’t speak. My son also spoke at a “late age”, a week before he turned 2 but she is really worrying me.  

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@bitternut it will all work out. You are doing amazing!  

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@coupe thanks dear  

Answer 7

I would get a second opinion as well. We started speech with my son at 2. His pediatrician wrote a script for a developmental delay, early intervention -clearbrook in Arlington Heights reached out, asked me my concerns and did an in home evaluation. I don’t know if they are allowed to start coming into homes to evaluate yet, but always worth calling to see! **We did have to get the Dr to rewrite the note as a speech delay for insurance to cover but that wasn’t an issue. And extra exposure to speech early on is always beneficial!  

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@bony4015 thank you!  

Answer 8

@career727 can you give any advice?  

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@disentitle7074 I will pm mom

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@career727 thank you!  

Answer 9

I did early intervention with my daughter and it helped her a lot. She talks much better now but she’s still not at the level a 5 year old should be. I’ve noticed that daycare and being around other kids has helped her a lot as well. We tried speech Theray once she aged out of early intervention but my insurance did not cover it and it became expensive. We are a Spanish English home as well.  

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I don’t think my 5yr old is where she should be either. We did a neuropsych eval and she does need speech, but everything Has been put on hold unless I want televisits for her. I decided To hold off because seriously a 5 year old is not going to do well with a televisit. Either way, the 3 visits we’ve had already were so expensive, not sure how many sessions we could afford in the long run. Is there anything you are doing with your 5 year old at home now?  

Answer 10

I would highly recommend seeking an evaluation. DHS would be the easiest in normal times, it’s free and they come to your house. But I would see what your insurance would cover. There are often long waits to see good psychologists, so make an appointment and if she improves while you are waiting, great, you can cancel. I had my daughters speech evaluated just before she turned 2 because she had words but wasn’t stringing them together. They said she was within normal limits, but gave good strategies to move her along. This gave me pieced mind. Early speech intervention is common and things are easier to resolve if you do it earlier. Good luck!  

Answer 11

I'm very surprised that a ped would say it's the worst thing you could do! Not seeing the harm! My son didn't talk much until 22-24 months. I really don't think it would hurt. Hope you get a second opinion with some type of home visit!  

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@milch46765 she doesn’t have problems walking, in fact she runs faster than I can at times  She throws a ball quite far and is very coordinated when kicking her ball around. She is really good at problem solving. She definitely surprises us all the time. She just won’t talk. My family says it cause we spoil her too much, I don’t see how (typical parent, huh ).  

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Boy I read the post way too fast. My mistake!  

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@milch46765 no worries  

Answer 12

My son was the same way at 2. He will be now 2. 5years. We did Early intervention a few months ago but then the whole covid-19 started plus we were also doing chemo treatments so we also delayed it. We speak two languages as well to him. Our pediatrician said that is also why his language is delayed at his 2 year check up. He understands both and speaks both. He’s almost 2. 5 and has learn and speaks more. He’s not say two word sentences but we are getting there. Definitely get a second opinion but also give her some time. Best of luck.  

Answer 13

EI is working they have something called speech teletherapy during this pandemic. I have twin boys tomorrow they are turning 3. They are non verbal they don't follow directions at all. They are not showing any signs of autism at all. We have done speech therapy thru EI since October. They progressed a bit not whole a lot. They need more time. At this point I am getting worried, but I am trying to stay calm and I am in process in registering them to preschool where they will help them with speec. They will put them in developmental delayed program. By the way we never went to get them evaluated for medical diagnostic. I thought let give them more time.  

Answer 14

Our daughter didn’t talk much by the age of 2, mainly because her big bro did a lot of the talking for her lol she had speech therapy through the ELC when she was 3 for half a year, which helped a lot. She’s totally fine now, and won’t quit talking

Answer 15

Definitely get an evaluation through Early Intervention. I'm really surprised your pediatrician did not recommend this. They give a full evaluation for speech, cognitive development, fine/gross motor skills etc and then work with you to get you the services needed. Fees are on a sliding scale and they take insurance. Two of my kids were evaluated for speech, one was fine one ended up needing speech therapy. When he aged out of EI services at 3yo, we transitioned easily to the ELC.  

Answer 16

Also, if you'd like a second opinion from another pediatrician, I recommend ours, Dr. Vassmer at Lutheran General. She is who recommended EI evaluation for my kids.  

Answer 17

You could go private but your right is to have a free evaluation through Early Intervention. Early intervention is responsible for her services until she turns three, then she goes to the school district. Initiate an evaluation ASAP. She should have more words at this point even if they aren’t articulated correctly.  

Answer 18

I know someone who's daughter didn't speak much but she was picking up alll the words and languages (also two languages) and eventually she did start and now won't stop

Answer 19

We had a similar experience. Our two year old wasn’t as verbal as we expected and asked our pediatrician about a speech delay. Our prediatrician took the “wait and see” approach with us when we asked about speech therapy which didn’t satisfy our concerns. We decided to go ahead with the speech therapy and she benefited from it in every way. She gained confidence, we gained understanding, and she’s now 4, in preschool and still receives speech one a week at school. I would suggest you follow your gut and get your child whatever help she may need. Good luck to you! I’m sure she will thrive!  

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We also had concerns about our other daughter regarding some sort of spectrum or sensory processing disorder. We also brought these concerns to our pediatrician and was told “she’d grow out of it”, but after her having extreme difficulty in school (one preschool told us they couldn’t handle her and the other one immediately notice something “off” and started the evaluations for an IEP to get her the services she needed). During this time we decided to proceed with occupational therapies and later (1st grade) a neuropsych eval so we could again gain more understanding and some sort of formal diagnosis. This process was so eye opening and reaffirming for us as parents as we felt like we were being told we were overreacting when in fact she does have some diagnoses that we now know better and are working with her, her school, and her therapist on overcoming. You got this momma! And so does your daughter! Keep advocating for her.  

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Diana, do you mind if I PM you?  

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Thank you @cupule for sharing your experience. So glad your little girls are doing great and are getting what they need. I’m def calling the DHS Arlington Heights to at least get the paperwork started. And I’ll see her pediatrician again on May 10th and hope he can offer some more resources. My husband and I are worried sick.  

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@ungula of course. PM me anytime.  

Answer 20

I'm no Dr. Phil but I have been in childcare for close to two decades. I've been around a lot of different children. My pearls of wisdom, you're doing great. Don't pressure/stress about it. She's still young. Two is young. She'll get there. I promise. Around 3. 5/4 is when I would start to stress, get help, etc. Your best bet, keep talking to her. One thing I enjoy, is even when going for a walk point out things and say the world slowly. When reading a book, read slow, and point out things and repeat the word a couple times. I'm sure you're doing great. Follow your gut, but there's really still time.  

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There is a lot of evidence based research indicating that starting therapy early is best. The “wait and see” approach unfortunately leaves some kids with difficulties down the road.  

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@jawbreaker31 thank you  

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‍♀️ just saying I've been around 2 year olds that have trouble speaking and then I've been around 2 year olds that talk like there's no tomorrow. Some, the parents have taken to speech therapy and some have let it be. Either way, the kids always started talking. Maybe it's from being a nanny in Glencoe for four years, but the amount of pressure those parents put on their little kids, rather than just letting them be kids, was kind of mind boggling.  

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I agree that every 2 year old is at a different level with speech. But I also agree with the mentality if you think something is off, there’s no harm in going through the testing. We started at 22 months. Adding the speech therapist gave him that extra push he needed. It essentially was an hr a week of her playing with him and over emphasizing the speech she was using in her play. Early intervention will only work with your kid until they turn 3. Then you have to rely on the schools or private groups. It’s better to start and test now than to wait. If you wait till closer to 3, EI May tell you to wait till 3 and do it with the school. They have to have at least a 30% deficiency to qualify. If they don’t qualify, you can still get some really good tips and ideas on where to fill in the gaps. I would do it again in a heart beat!  

Answer 21

I can only tell you about what we did in our home, I'm a parent to twins also, but YouTube helped. Saying momma and pappa. And then learning the alphabet.  

Answer 22

Ps, does she use a pacifier or suck her fingers at all?  

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@jawbreaker31 nope, she’s never done either one.  

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Just curious. Follow your heart and your gut. You guys are doing great!  

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@jawbreaker31 thanks babe!  

Answer 23

That’s a strange reaction from the doctor. My son started speech therapy at 2. It was awesome and he loved going. It’s like they get a playmate for an hour a week. You could go through EI early intervention or get evaluated from a private company if your health insurance covers it. We went to City Kids in Jefferson Park which was 15 min from DP but there are places all over. For us it was cheaper through our health insurance but others EI is cheaper.  

Answer 24

Giving choices helps. Do you want a fork or a spoon? Do you want an apple or a pear, etc.  

Answer 25

My daughter didn’t start talking until closer to 3. She’s 5 now and now talks so much it’s to much hahaha jk

Answer 26

EI saved my daughter. I would re evaluate that Dr. for saying that. If you do get approved, I'm sure you would from what you described, I would definitely do the therapy at a physicality rather than in home (of course after lockdown is over). We went to Jewish Childrens Bureau (JCB) and no you dont need to be Jewish. Jody Miller was fantastic and later got us into occupational therapy with another Jody Miller aka OT Jody and that combo was just what she needed. EI is wonderful!  

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@virus thank you. Tomorrow I’ll be blowing up everyone’s phone  

Answer 27

We used EI for my son and loved it. He is now 3 and is in Speech with the District at the Early Learning Center, which we love as well! Right now his speech teacher is doing remote work with him.  
https://www.dhs.state.il.us/page.as...31183

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@diocese2054 thank you! It’s great to get so much feedback from all you great moms out there  

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@bitternut Not a problem! It takes a village so let's be that village!  

Answer 28

This group is pretty rad!  

Answer 29

Yay on the update!