Question

I am in month two of the cash envelope system. This month I added the Spending Log to my daily routine and things are going along so well. I am doing a great job!. my husband, on the other hand, is going a bit off the rails! We have had a few "sit down and discuss" times. I just have to find a solution for his need to buy me flowers and bring presents home to the kids at the end of a long business trip away from home. I don't want to make him stop the kindness, I just want him to pay with cash and not use the credit card! Any ideas? He travels once a month for business and is gone for a week each time! I have a side hustle that can supplement the expenditure, but it cuts into the amount of money I can use to pay off credit card debt. He never spends money outside of these trips.  

Answer 1

I feel your reasoning. but maybe start just setting aside a monthly budget for it. I cant see you taking that away from him :/

Answer 2

I agree with the ladies above. Set a budget for his sweet gifts, nicely have a conversation with him smothering him with appreciation. but setting a limit of funds for these things. And yes, while it may take a little longer to dig out of debt. some women wait a lifetime for a husband who acknowledges their love and appreciation for their family. At the end of the day, this sounds like a way he says “I love you” and that is a priceless gift. (A priceless gift that can most certainly have a monetary limit. I have the same issue with my hubs. gift giving is his love language. ) ❤️

Comments

@perennate mine too. In the early years I tried to tell him that I didn’t enjoy that cute spontaneous coffe mug or the flowers as much as I would like to have a getaway with him. It took a while but when he finally figured out I really meant it, we now put money aside each holiday towards a trip instead of gifts.  

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@undercroft That’s a great idea!  

Answer 3

When my husband was on his 1st deployment , I would always “see” these expenses and ruin the surprise . Since then, it’s worked for each of us to have money in a separate account for stuff like this. If the amount isn’t causing an issue, maybe discuss it with him and see if setting a separate debit acct he manages would be helped as opposed to using a credit card.