+44 votes
by (1.7k points)
WWTBMD?  I crunched the numbers for the first time today.WWTBMD? I crunched the numbers for the first time today. If I become a stay at home parent, we would add an extra $500 a month to our budget. I have a 4yo and 10mo old twins. This is very tempting especially scince COVID hit. I have become much more confident in my “mom skills. ” Is it worth it for me to quit my full time job? Is it nuts to think I could find a remote work gig to bring in some more money and keep my “skills? ” What would you do? Thanks!  
WWTBMD?  I crunched the numbers for the first time today.

37 Answers

+21 votes
by (3.9k points)
 
Best answer
I choose to stay home. The daycare $ and hours away from my kids wasn't worth it. Now I have a side hustle that pays for extras and I didn't miss any of my last 2 kids "firsts" ♡♡
by (1.7k points)
@penknife right?!? I have loved seeing my twins crawl for the first time and interact. It has been so fun and memorable!  
by (3.9k points)
@farrell yes! It's the best  
+19 votes
by (510 points)
I would totally do that!  
+25 votes
by (870 points)
I ended up quitting my job and becoming a wellness coach from home and we are actually doing better than we ever have! ❤️
+16 votes
by (1.5k points)
We chose for me to stay home quite some time ago and sooo glad I did!  
0 votes
by (310 points)
We were in a similar position two years ago. I decided to stay home. We save more money with me being home and being diligent about the budget and the shopping then we ever did while we were both working. Its not for everyone though from an emotional and mental standpoint. It gets lonely and isolating. Also, i would make sure that your emergency fund is at a healthy 6months before you do it. When left with only one income, a job loss would be devastating and no one knows what even the most steady jobs will look like in the other side if this. Good luck either way!  
by (1.7k points)
@establishmentarian1 good points!  
by (310 points)
@farrell I have three under 7 as well. if you have other questions, feel free to pm me.  
+29 votes
by (5.8k points)
When I had my twins I stayed home because we actually made more money if I didn’t work! I don’t regret one minute of it. If you can do it then go ahead. Oh and I’m sure you could find something remote out there.  
+23 votes
by (6.1k points)
My only question would be retirement and insurance. Maybe have your partner put the 500 towards retirement funds.  
+18 votes
by (7.5k points)
I personally couldn't do it. I need the adult stimulation and interaction. I work part time. But I also only have one kiddo and a fantastic nanny situation that makes it worth it.  
by (2.5k points)
@izard same! I’m home right now with three alone and I’m tired of 24/7 always being needed. At least at work I could at least go to the bathroom or have lunch alone.  
by (760 points)
I am the same way! Last month I ended up having three days off together and I thought I was going insane, definitely cried at least once. I give kudos to stay at home parents, it's just not for me.  
by (1.7k points)
@izard I have always thought the exact same thing. Until this experience hit. I have always loved to work. The first month was rough! But now we are in a good routine. I think to shock of it is why I am so conflicted.  
+2 votes
by (1.9k points)
In this situation you need to follow your heart. If you want to be a SAHM mom then do it. It's more than just having mom skills though. it can take a toll on you emotionally/mentally. It's a very tough, yet rewarding, job.  
+23 votes
by (6.2k points)
Who carries the insurance? If it’s you, don’t forget to add in those extra costs. Personally, I’m a workaholic. The only way I would consider staying at home to raise children was if I was blessed with multiples. If you’re spending more on gas to/from work and childcare costs than you are bringing in (actual cash and benefits) then I’d definitely stay home. Something to consider though is if you’re currently contributing to retirement, I’d make sure to keep contributing to something if you did stay home. I’d also consider raising life insurance on yourself because if something happens to you, then extra costs (childcare especially) would happen for your SO
by (1.7k points)
@diapedesis6 good points! I have always been a workaholic too! (Heck I am working now just on my 15 min break) which is why this decision is so hard and scary for me!  
+19 votes
by (1.9k points)
If you’ve done the math, then definitely! and you could always find a part time home job! go girl!  
+38 votes
by (800 points)
I was a stay at home mom for nearly 18 months. While I enjoyed spending time with my little one, I lost myself. I started to work from home so I could at least feel like I was contributing something besides being a mom. I put him in daycare for 2 days a week in the beginning and then 4. I personally really needed that break. Having the extra $500 a month for your budget would be great, but just don’t forget to take time for you. Being a stay at home mom is a 24/7 job, I felt like I could never leave it. You can always try it out.  
+9 votes
by (2.4k points)
Whew. I remember those days of weighing the cost of four in daycare versus just staying home! Does your spouse carry the insurance for your family? Is his work stable/secure? How’s your emergency fund? I don’t need the answers but those are things you should consider in your decision.  
+36 votes
by (940 points)
I would quit, BUT you have to consider how being at home full time will affect you mentally as well. I stay at home with my 19 month old, and there are some days I wished I worked to have a “break”  I could only imagine how it would be with more.  
+37 votes
by (1.4k points)
My opinion, you should at least try it! If you don’t like it, you can find another job! The job is what held me back from staying home for a long time but once I quit - so many other doors opened for me and my family!  
+25 votes
by (2.7k points)
I stayed home for seven years with my kiddos and picked up freelance jobs editing along the way I’d say go for it. Whatever you decide to do for your work, make sure you set up a space and a schedule
+27 votes
by (1.2k points)
I think a lot of companies are considering full remote at this point!  
+11 votes
by (950 points)
As long as you can provide Obadiah for yourself and family, I don't think it sounds like a bad idea
by (1.2k points)
@dial what is Obadiah?  
by (950 points)
@fame1 insurancemy bad. Autocorrect
+34 votes
by (1.7k points)
I’d probably look for a remote gig BEFORE you quit your day job. I’ve heard many people touting the idea, but few who actually successfully landed a gig
+29 votes
by (4.5k points)
Will you be okay without the other adult interaction associated with work? Will your partner expect that you’ll be in charge of the majority of household duties (if you aren’t already), if so, are you okay with that? If you’re okay with the above, I would do it. This first year I’ve spent on maternity leave has been amazing, I truly cannot understand how anyone could go back to work so early, (although I completely understand why).  
0 votes
by (850 points)
What is your job experience? With the way the world is now you could certainty work from home doing something
+6 votes
by (1.2k points)
Child care with those age kids ain’t worth
by (1.7k points)
@drachma tell me about it!  It is $3k a month on child care.  
by (1.2k points)
@farrell I dont bring home 3k a month
+4 votes
by (600 points)
I would stay home with your kids. And if it saves you money that's even better. Enjoy that precious time.  
+1 vote
by (5.9k points)
I have 17 month twins and a 4 year old. no way I could do any committed jobs with time schedules - that said I’ve found a few things that could work for me and am happy to share some ideas if you’d like  none of them are MLM ‍♀️
by (1.7k points)
I'm interested
by (520 points)
@roadblock I would love some ideas for my daughter. She was laid off and my son in law is in grad school not working.  
by (250 points)
@roadblock I would love some ideas too - trying to make it work for me to stay home
by (220 points)
@roadblock I'm interested
by (1.7k points)
@roadblock so I am not far behind you then! As you know life is nuts but so full with twins and 4yo. I would love to hear your ideas. Thanks for the comment and ideas!  
+7 votes
by (4k points)
I absolutely love being a stay at home mom and it’s 100% worth every sacrifice. If you do plan to work from home you’ll still need to accommodate for child care though since most work will still require your full attention and your kids are too young to entertain themselves for the most part
+6 votes
by (440 points)
Stay home! ❤️❤️
+43 votes
by (520 points)
It depends on how much that $500 is worth. For some going to work and having adult interaction and the feeling useful is important For others it’s staying home. Staying home, is the hardest job ever (spent 8yrs in Army) and I loved every minute of it. For the last few years hubs has worked from home. I can’t stay home with him home all day. I hope you find what works for you and your families needs.  
+24 votes
by (1.6k points)
I answer calls for an amusement park.  
+38 votes
by (890 points)
I am a stay at home mom, I have 3 girls and they are 6, 3 and 1. It’s not easy. I want to pull my hair out on a daily basis and someone constantly touching me and needing something makes me crazy, but I don’t think I could work. My baby goes to sleep at 6 and then I try and relax the rest of the night, my husband will do bed time with the older two
+16 votes
by (1.1k points)
I initially went stir crazy as I've always been independent. BUT that soon wore off and I wouldn't have changed that opportunity for anything! Mine is now 11 and i have since went back to work, and man, has the time flown. He drives in 2. 5 years. If the financial aspect has potential and he can grow within his role and wages. I would in a heartbeat  
+9 votes
by (990 points)
Some things to factor in. I spend more $ being at home than I did when working. More elaborate meals. Most of our playdates are not free, they're at toddler time places, art design places, etc etc etc. I also buy more for myself and the kids to entertain us at home (books, toys, craft supplies). It all adds up. I easily spend more than $500 each month. I'm also not going to say being a SAHM is difficult or the hardest thing I've ever done. It's easy compared to getting up, going to work, getting kids ready and out the door; coming home to keep up with laundry, food, errands, groceries. My career required much more brainpower and being "on" than being a mom does. I'm going stir crazy right now though!  
by (1.7k points)
@titular all great points! Thanks for that advice on the “extras”
+41 votes
by (2.3k points)
I’m a stay at home mom with 21 month old twins. I absolutely love it but having a side job at home seems impossible. I definitely recommend staying home with them AND saving $500. You will never look back and regret having spent that time with them!  
+1 vote
by (4.2k points)
It all depends on the math and what you’re willing to sacrifice. I worked full time as a supervisor in healthcare but my hours sucked and we were moving pretty far to commute. Did the math and I would only have an extra $500 a month take home pay if I continued working and had to put the kids in daycare. (That was when it was just my daughter, now with two kids I’m sure it would be 0). I pull in that much a month doing my side hustle and I’m able to be with the kids while hubby commutes. Sacrificed a few things like cable and we don’t go out to fancy meals or do a whole lot of extra splurge shopping like we used to. But with the budget mom method we are not as strapped as we were, even ahead of the game a bit. My advice is to sit down and make a budget list. Find a hobby or skill you can turn into a side gig  and especially with covid, remote positions are much more accessible, even desirable
+37 votes
by (2.6k points)
I loved being home with my kids. And after the years at home, I found a new line of work. I am pursuing nursing now and will be working again in 2 years. No regrets being home. I spent less. because I cooked, instead of eating out, didn't have to buy such fancy clothes, had time to fix things myself instead of paying other people to fix them for me, etc. Also, my husbands career skyrocketed.  
by (2.4k points)
Me, too! When I was a SAHM, we saved a lot. I cooked everything. I couponed. We kept a big garden going. I shopped consignment & thrift. I used cloth diapers. I drove a 1994 car. I kept it all very simple & cheap and focused on the kids having fun and growing strong. So many trips to the library, anything free, new toys from yard sales. I was such a tightwad mom!  
+13 votes
by (2.4k points)
I stopped working for about 3 years, and was a FT SAHM to my (then) 18 mo and my newborn. When the little one turned 3, I started WFH in a PT role. Working made me much happier overall. It restored balance. It saved my brain. I feel like often a mix is better than an absolute. Now that little one is 7, and my career is booming, and I still WFH. It all worked out. I am glad I stopped when I did. I am glad I returned when I did. Timing is an important factor.  
by (2.4k points)
This is just another way of saying you can have it all, but you usually can’t have it all at the same time.  
+41 votes
by (2.3k points)
Do whats best for you and your family! I agree these are scary times and I personally would want more time with my babies. It’s easy enough to find a side hustle when needed.  
+19 votes
by (12k points)
If you can then I think you should. You won’t regret it and your kids will thank you (when they’re older, lol). Lots of free and low cost activities, play dates, parks, nature, crafts, science projects, library etc. Kids really don’t need much. It’s the parents that think they need expensive stuff because it’s us that try to keep up with the Jones’s. Good luck with your decision!  
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