Question

My four year old has developed a huge fear of spiders. She went from easily falling asleep at night since she was a baby to screaming inconsolably at bedtime. I have tried “spider spray” but would you believe that a spider crawled across her ceiling 2 minutes later? She is beside herself with fear. I feel so bad! Does anyone have any experience with this or any suggestions? Thanks!  

Answer 1

My now 16 year old recently reminded me that I told her they were girl spiders and wanted to have a sleepover since her room was so pretty

Answer 2

My son is 10 year old and he is so scared of spiders, flies, and moths. I have no suggestions for you, but I know how you feel. My son cried when a moth flew is his room and says it was going to sting him.  

Answer 3

Show her these cuties!  
https://m.ranker.com/list/cute-spid...-vega

Comments

In all seriousness though, take this opportunity to teach her all about spiders and their role in the ecosystem.  

Answer 4

When my kids were small, we watched Charlotte’s Web - and then I named all the spiders in my house “Charlotte! ” That way, they weren’t as afraid, AND I didn’t have to kill them. While spiders are great for a home, I don’t particularly like them, either!  

Comments

Ironically, I just realized that my grand dog’s name is. Charlotte! Lol

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I second Charlotte. I actually am petrified of spiders but Charlotte always gives me comfort.  

Answer 5

I totally agree w these ladies. I used to be so darn afraid of Centipedes until i looked at photos of them up close and saw how cute their faces are. Now i just imagine their cute face and it gets me through!  

Answer 6

I've not experienced this from the parent side, but I was nearly phobic about insects as a kid. My mom walked into a room and found me crying in a corner because there was an ant in the room. I still have my moments with insects, but what helped me was talking about what I was afraid of, learning interesting insect facts, and (this might sound weird) learning how to empathize with insects. What I mean by empathize was that I came to understand that they were going about their lives just like I was going about mine, that they didn't choose to be insects any more than I chose to be a human, and that they were busy doing something else, not looking for a way to get me. That all might be a bit much for a 4 year old, but that's my personal experience.  

Answer 7

My attitude if my kids are fearful of something is to NOT reinforce it. No sprays or anything because they aren’t something we need to be afraid of. I would follow the other advice of launching into some exposure to help him get to know spiders and also if one bothers him he can let you know. They are more afraid of us and aren’t in the right place when they are in our home. they want to be out with their friends finding food. Good luck  

Answer 8

Peppermint oil will get rid of them

Answer 9

We were really big on education. We did a lot of spider reading and looking at pictures. Moved a lot of spiders outside in cups and in hands. Now my son really loves spiders.  

Answer 10

I also have a fear of spiders so I feel for her. however when my daughter was terrified of worms and they were literally every on the walk to the bus stop, I bought her the book “diary of a worm” and it really helped her get over the fear. She was 6 at the time. Maybe try that and explain spiders are similar -they’re more afraid of us. The worm in the book has a spider friend too  

Answer 11

When mine were afraid of bugs and when they saw one in the house, I would say 'Oh look! It's my friend Fred! I met him the other day outside. I think he's lost and too far from home. Let's put him back outside. ' Giving the spider a name will help. Now, mine aren't so afraid. Well, my 4 yr old is still a little, but he's better now. He'll ask if if that one's my friend too.  And I can only squish the big ones because the little ones are babies.  

Answer 12

Just tell her they say that everyone eats about 4 spiders per year while they sleep. then she'll keep her mouth shut! Just kidding, don't tell her this, even though that's supposed to be true  . But how did they figure that out? Love the creative suggestions posted. sleepover ‍♀️ . agree w Peppermint Oil, Charlotte, teaching spiders purpose. Also compare size on tape measure, and how many inches bigger she is than spider. It's ok not to like spiders. As she gets to be a "big girl", maybe she won't be afraid anymore.  

Answer 13

I’m a certified pediatric sleep consultant and owner of The Well Rested Club. I like to handle fears in one of two ways: 1. Don’t bring it up or talk about it unless she does. (Sometimes the more attention we bring it the bigger the fear grows) 2. If she brings it up or you think she does better with talking about it I get books and videos on the subject that aren’t scary. Learn about all the great things spiders do and how the ones in our house do not hurt us. Advice with this topic would be to read and watch everything before her to make sure nothing is negative or scary. I wouldn’t do spider spray because I think it adds to the fear. I would however sit with her in her room in the dark and help her explore what she’s afraid of. Some shadows may really look like spiders. And if she has you there to look with her in a calm way it will help!  

Answer 14

Thank you for the advice, ladies!  

Answer 15

When my son was this age he was scared of monsters so I bought a plastic spray bottle and created a label and said monster spray and I would fill it with water and spray it around his bedroom before bed. Worked every time!  

Answer 16

I let a tarantula walk on my arm, to see how it felt. Did this before going to Dominican Republic. Thought it would help me to be less scared if I came across one there, but honestly I still would have freaked out. Although the Tarantula was fine, the legs felt like little Q-tips crawling up my arm.  

Answer 17

Exposure. Plain and simple. I show my girls bugs all of the time. We talk about how cool they are, what their jobs are and how we are kind to them. Do it at a distance and slowly get closer.  

Answer 18

I agree show her charlottes web and explain that spiders are more scared of us. Also while your doing this. Buy some peppermint seeds and plant a border of peppermint around the exterior. of your home like a invisble fence but with peppermint seeds once it sprouts you won't have any spiders in your home besides the ones that are already there. Just keep reassuring her that they are harmless. If you have to kill them make a game out of it. I gave my son a spray bottle full of water he would spray and i would smash. After a few times of this he wanted to actually go look for them to kill them lol! Good luck

Answer 19

I also fear insects and I'm old! I can't stand the way their legs look from the underside. I agree with helping her read up on them to understand them, so she won't think they are out to get her. When people say, they keep other insects under control, I always say, well the other insects don't look as creepy! But what helped me is making an agreement with them.  I say, I see you, and you stay there, and I'll be over here. We'll be good as long as we each mind our business