Question

* SEEKING ADVICE FOR STARTING A FAMILY * Hi there  Hubs and I are in the beginning stages of our debt free journey. I’m a Doctor of Physical Therapy. Hubs is a Dentist who just stepped into his families practice! I started working full-time in October. Since then we’ve paid off just under $10k of our enormous SIX FIGURE STUDENT LOAN DEBT burden. Yes, six figures of entirely student loan debt. Right now we’re: - living entirely off of my salary - throwing all extra money towards debt - not buying a house for the foreseeable future ✨ BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY ✨ ✨ We want to start our family! ✨ For those of you who have begun your family on this debt free journey, I have questions for you: - Do you wish you waited to start until you were debt free? - Did you budget differently knowing you were trying to get preggers to adjust? ANY GUIDANCE IS APPRECIATED. In an ideal world, we would be debt free before starting our family. However, we will be paying off debt for the next several years and don’t feel comfortable putting off our dream of a family until that time. Thanks in advance!  

Answer 1

If you wait for the "right time" you will never start a family.  

Comments

@poore this SOOOO much. When you start longing for them is when the time is "right" (different for some) and then you jump. Kids are one of those things that you 100% figure out along the way, and that will NEVER end, even when they graduate  

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@criminality988 also doesn’t matter how many you have lol. I’ve got a 10 year old, 7 year old, and now 2 month old. They are all so different that I still have to wing it each day and hope for the best  

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@inez445 yes! I have two but there is six years between them and each time has been sooo different AND I forgot a lot of things from my first.  

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@inez445 different is right, I call my 2 day & night they are so different

Answer 2

Your mindset is fantastic for whatever timeline comes next. An awareness to budgeting and debt will help your journey to starting a family, should you choose to do so. We started our debt free journey with two kids and one on the way. It can be done as long as the awareness is there. You’re in the right place ♥️

Answer 3

We’re in the same boat with 6figure student loan debt. We have a one year old! Cloth diapers have saved us a ton. I started shopping sales while I was pregnant, our son has his own budget, ask for hand me downs from friends/family

Comments

Message me, if you have more questions!  

Answer 4

I would start a sinking fund towards it. Maybe have a goal of a years worth of daycare saved up, and all the medical bills covered too. That’ll give you a good head start.  

Answer 5

Start researching childcare and start budgeting for that cost now. My child care is more than my mortgage. I want the best care for my children as we all do, but it does come at a cost. Factor in the new medical insurance premiums as well. Best of luck to you just remember, being a parent is the hardest yet most rewarding job you’ll ever have ❤️

Answer 6

It’s much different regarding cost of birth, healthcare etc. In Canada but we had a baby before we really started focusing on our budget, the biggest thing I realized is that you don’t need as much “stuff” as you think you do, or that is marketed as a must have. Buy 2-3 pairs of good quality maternity pants, you can buy regular tops a size up, maybe budget around 1-2k to set up baby’s room depending on how sturdy/long term you want the furniture to be, we bought some quality pieces she’ll be able to use for her whole childhood so that was worth it to me. Don’t get sucked into the perfect instagram or Pinterest nursery, it’s tempting but not worth it, you can find some great decor pieces at craft shows and places like michaels.  

Answer 7

I’m 36 with a 3 year old wanting a second child. The only thing I regret is waiting for the perfect time. There isn’t such thing. Debt will be gone eventually and you already great at budgeting you’ll be great at getting baby expenses in as they come. Just do the list and prep. Plus you never know how long your journey to motherhood will be. If your heart is ready then maybe this is the right time?  

Answer 8

Looking back, I would have. I am about to give birth, and have had severe complications that I could not predict, so I wound up unable to work, which was a huge financial setback and worry for this baby we are about to have.  

Answer 9

Don’t wait! Just save up!  

Answer 10

I have a six figure student loan debt (unfortunately, I needed all the degrees for my current career that I absolutely love) My husband and I do not have any other loans or debt besides that. My husband put it into perspective for me when we first started Family planning which was: just think of your student debts as a regular bill you get every month (similar to a mortgage or an electricity bill) It helped me see my loans differently and it didn't defeat me like it use to. We created a seperate family savings and set a goal on the amount we wanted to have saved up before trying. This gave us a cushion that helped us prepare for having a child.  

Answer 11

Don’t wait. We did only to find out we suffer from infertility at the age of 36. If I could go back, I would’ve started trying as soon as possible.  

Answer 12

We have 6 kids. You will never regret a sweet child ♥️ You will be great parents.  

Answer 13

Don’t wait!  

Answer 14

@overmeasure This is me right now

Comments

@yorkshire66095 yes it is! And you’re doing great at planning and saving.  

Answer 15

As someone with similar student loan debt, which we just treat as a second mortgage- it ain’t going anywhere anytime soon - definitely don’t wait because you never know how easy or complicated the journey to parenthood may be.  

Answer 16

Assuming you live in the United States, the three most expensive factors in terms of having a child are maternity leave (3 months or more is ideal), healthcare, and childcare. Those costs vary a lot depending on circumstances. I had children very young and we struggled a lot. I regretted that a bit until I watched my sister go through infertility treatments after delaying marriage and children. Infertility is one of the hardest things couples can go through and delaying a family increases the risk. I also agree that no one ever feels ready to start a family!  

Answer 17

Don't wait

Answer 18

It depends on your age. If you’re in your 20s, pay off the debt. If you’re in your 30s get to gettin’! There really is no perfect time. The perfect time for you is when it happens! Your kids and situation become your new normal. You adapt to whatever your life is.  

Answer 19

We waited until we bought our house, because we wanted a stable environment for our child, we were debt free, until she was in daycare, now we are a single family income, still paying off debt at a slower rate

Answer 20

I married my husband at 35 and we had our first kiddo when I was 36. No amount of money or debt in the world would stop me from trying sooner. I know this isn’t the “practical” answer you’re looking for, but when it comes to fertility there is no timeline except to start ASAP. Regardless. Children are amazingly adaptable. You have a wonderful life to share.  

Comments

@coolidge this is 100% a practical answer! The well-being of you and your child is always the #1 priority! Money comes and goes!  

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@rocher right. if there were different circumstances, I may say, “wait a bit, ” but this is a great situation to be in for a child. Two stable, employed parents who only want the best. Even if they both worked at Walmart, that is still better than 97% of the babies on this planet get.  

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@coolidge honestly, I think anyone who sits and weighs the factors of “is this a good scenario for my child” are probably 99% ready to be good parents. Because they are already concerned about what’s best for their child and actually taking the steps to try to be the best they can for that child. Which as you said is better than 97% of the rest.  

Answer 21

We had our daughter right before we started our debt free journey not knowing what it was, looking at it now I wish we waited. We are postponing the second until we are debt free. However, age of the parents and the siblings age difference can be important, and that’s a good reason! But us waiting to be debt free only postpones is wanting a baby 6-9months on the long side. I’m 23 and my husband is 28. He is army and I’m an EMT/Homemaker (now)

Answer 22

We are expecting now, I’ll only be 9 months into paying off my loans but I did not want to wait longer for a family. I felt I already sacrificed that time being in school and time is precious. I have not changed my budget much, I’m not spending as much free money so I’ve been able to still pay down the debt and put money aside for my leave  

Answer 23

I agree with everyone, also take into consideration if it's the right time in your career too since you both have great jobs. Good luck.  

Answer 24

Congrats! My husband and I have 4 kids ✌. Every child brings his or her blessings into this world, into our homes. our families. I say, if God blesses your family with a baby, go for it! Plus, you both have a whole career ahead of you. What’s impossible?  

Answer 25

I got pregnant by surprise and honestly it’s the only thing that made me get my life together as far as budgeting. When my daughter was 5 months old we switched from 2 incomes to 1 my husband left his job to stay home with her and we have made it along. So you don’t HAVE to wait to start a family. I have made more headway in paying off debt as the sole income earner in my home then I ever did when we were both working so if you guys are ok as is and are making it by then I don’t see why you would have to wait. However, down the line if you both have to work and need childcare you will need to reconsider where your money is going to adjust for that it’s craZy expensive (why my husband decided to stay home)