+45 votes
by (3.8k points)
This is like a 17 part question for moms of 4 year olds. Do you give your 4 year old an allowance? If so, how much? Do you require him or her to do chores for it? If so, what chores?  
This is like a 17 part question for moms of 4 year olds.

38 Answers

+24 votes
by (5.7k points)
 
Best answer
No. And chores is a contribution as family member.  
+20 votes
by (780 points)
I have a 4 and 6 year old. We created a reward chart of responsibilities they have to complete every day. We created a goal- i. e. earn 30 stars a week and they get a reward of their choosing (as long as it’s reasonable). We did do an allowance in the past but my kids like playing with their piggy banks and would just lose that money so we stopped
by (1.9k points)
This  but we set the reward at the beginning of the week. Thankspically and outing with mom or dad, movie Theater, ice cream shop or dollar store. Now we are picking from an activity box ( dollar store activities), Friday treat day etc.  
by (780 points)
@gunderson yes! Our rewards are set at the beginning of the week too! And surprisingly they set reasonable ones themselves.  
by (750 points)
@sylvia this with my 3 and 5 year old. We do a star chart. Mommy and daddy forget to update it a lot, but it still works somehow for the kids motivation!  
+5 votes
by (1.3k points)
No if she wants spending money I will give her some but I dont give out money weekly. If she did want to earn some I would let her but its not something Ive started
+25 votes
by (4.4k points)
Mine all had chores from an early age, simple things they could manipulate for their age and as they get the chore complexity changes with it. Cleaning up however was about taking responsibility for the messes they created. From a very young age I broke their toys down to sections and each got a color sticker matching the bucket it went into at night or the shelf it got placed on. Then after dinner it was clean up time. Each was assigned a color or two as the toys grew and I’d make a game having them race to see who found their color/s and got them away the fastest. It gave them healthy competition and got the room cleaned up for the next day. No reward just bragging rights. However as they did actual chores they needed to mark off as done, they’d earn things like an extra 30 minutes of tv, an ice cream cone. Money has no value to them at that age nor should it. Have them work for something tangible but small. As they grow older and money is something they then need, yes but make that for things other than the regular chores that they are doing as a member of the family. Example: helping dad clean out the garage or tool room, helping you bake for an event (they can do the cleaning), washing the car. etc. you get the idea.  
+27 votes
by (890 points)
We don’t have a 4 year old any more. but have 4 kids and we started when they were young. We give an allowance each week on Sunday mornings- it wasn’t directly tied to chores. Our reason for starting allowance was more about teaching about generosity and about money management. (Could this be because my husband is a financial advisor? )  The kids get their age in $ each week. so a 4 year old gets $4. Then we ask them to decide on their own how much should go in their “save envelope”, how much they put in their “give envelope” (to take to church, or to save up to give somewhere else that matters to them) and how much to put in their wallet to spend. Also, we helped them make a goal that once they saved a certain amount we’d take them to the bank and open a savings account for them. All 4 boys are building up savings to help pay for their first car some day  ‍♀️ works for us  
by (3.8k points)
@suborbital13 that's what I was thinking! And I'm also a financial advisor haha!  
by (890 points)
@bailiwick707 lol  
+2 votes
by (7k points)
No. No allowances at any age. You do chores as a contributing member of this household.  
+31 votes
by (3.2k points)
No allowances, as chores are part of being a contributing member of the household. I have a 4yo and a 1mo and my 4yo does small chores and cleans up after himself. It’s expected in our household and in my opinion helps to establish good habits from a young age without expecting anything in return. For example, as adults we don’t get money or rewards from someone else when we clean our house.  
+20 votes
by (2.8k points)
No. Yes (5 and one will be 4 in June) they do chores though. Wash their dishes after breakfast, make their bed, do assignments (whatever they need to do for school work that day), sweep the floor, bring down their laundry to wash, fold laundry (then I have to refold it ‍♀️).  
+19 votes
by (8.9k points)
My 13 year old cries all the time about no allowance. His sports alone are easily in the thousands. That’s his allowance. He says it’s my parental duty. I say take the garbage out and zip the mouth. I’m mean.  
by (3.6k points)
@sulfapyridine that’s what we say to my kids, too. Especially my daughter - she’s a dancer - and the one of the two that doesn’t contribute as much.  
by (8.9k points)
@deadhead726 amen. he wants to play football, basketball and baseball. With those things comes equipment, training camps, shoes, etc. he’s better paid than I am!  
by (3.6k points)
@sulfapyridine yep! Tuition, competition fees, dance shoes, clothes. It’s endless! And expensive!  
by (8.9k points)
@deadhead726 greedy little monsters. hahaha!  
by (3.6k points)
@sulfapyridine Bahahahaha! And yet I can barely get her to help empty the dishwasher  (to be fair, she’s hardly ever home, but still! )
by (8.9k points)
@deadhead726 same.  
by (4.7k points)
@sulfapyridine pay him an allowance and then make him pay for the sports?  
by (8.9k points)
@moneyed LOL!  
+23 votes
by (1.9k points)
4? No allowance as money means nothing to him, but he earns "prizes" for positive behaviors (not complaining at meal times, cleaning toys etc). and by prize it is something small(he loves dinos so earns like a Dino egg or small figure)
+5 votes
by (680 points)
Don’t plan on an allowance ever
+25 votes
by (6k points)
We give a dollar per age per week starting at 3. my 4 year old currently is in charge of wiping of the chairs after meals, putting his laundry away, making his bed, gathering trash around the house on trash night and putting in kitchen garbage can, picking up his toys. he helps fold hand towels and kitchen towels and he matches socks if he is with me when I'm folding laundry
+23 votes
by (1.7k points)
We started at age 6. $1 per week per age. But it came with teaching about money, etc and we knew they understood or we would have waited longer. They have buckets for spending, savings, charity. It is to learn about money and value of things. That video game they want? They know it will take a couple of months to save. This one time they saved 4 months for this watch that friends had (all it did was play games) and i knew it was a horrible watch and tried to talk them out of it. But they bought it. They used it for a week and regretted and said in the future they will think a little bit more whether it is something they really want. Also, every few months they take from their charity bucket and we research causes, etc. and donate. They also learn about taxes when buying something. No chores associated with allowance. But they do have chores that they do but because they live here and we all need to do our part. They do not do chores to get allowance  
+9 votes
by (4.1k points)
We do chores and kids get chore points. Those chore points can be traded for items (fun pencils, etc), privileges (electronic time - this is the only way my kids are allowed to use electronics, so if they don't have points, they can't use an electronic unless it's to complete schoolwork. They have learned that privileges are earned and if you don't help out around the house, you don't get extra "stuff"). You are expected to clean up after yourself, so cleaning one's room does not earn points. However, doing the garbage, emptying dishwasher, etc. earns points. I also will randomly give kindness points, if I see one of my kids being especially helpful or kind to others. The kids can also trade points for cash 10 points = one dollar, or they can trade points to be put in their investment account 8 points = one dollar, to help encourage the concept of saving.  
by (4.1k points)
We also charge points if we need to do their standard chores, so if you don't empty the dishwasher and I have to do it. I earn that point from that child's points. This was a game changer for my saver child, who was horrified that she had to "pay" me to do her chore.  
by (3.6k points)
@wraparound86 genius
by (4.1k points)
@deadhead726, you know your parents are accountants when.  
by (3.6k points)
@wraparound86 very true!  
+31 votes
by (2.7k points)
NO to Allowance! Especially for a 4 yr old. Take the natural approach to contributing as a family. My daughters and now my granddaughter all have learned “Life Skills” by actively participating in household tasks. It’s Fun and Sooo much learning gets done this way ❤️
+24 votes
by (5.9k points)
Ha! Our older kids get allowance for completing household helps. (Chores) but it’s to help them learn to do a good job. So our now 5 year old also gets a small $3 for her household helps a month $1 dollar goes to tithing at church, $1 hours in her piggy bank and we usually go to the dollar store and she can buy something. (I pay for the extra regardless) it’s the same for our bigger kids. But it helps all of them. Then they get to buy small birthday presents for siblings etc and learn to save. It’s been a great life lesson for our kids. They have a better understanding about $$ and that not everything is given to you. We obviously buy food and cloths and everything else ❤️
by (5.9k points)
Part 2 After meals help pick up the napkins (we use cloth and rewash) Sweeping the floor (it’s never done perfectly nor do we expect that it’s simply the action doing it) Folding her cloths and putting them away. Making her bed (to the best of her ability) and keeping her room tidy  Sometimes we do extra things together like raking leaves  we usually pay the kids with additional screen time or an extra scoop of ice cream  I use this loosely for my kids   
https://pin.it/56vb8hx
+30 votes
by (800 points)
No allowance for my 5 almost 6 and 3. They started wanting to help when we clean up so they dust with a swifter wand, spot clean wood floors, dust baseboards and wood doors with a rag. This mostly keeps them occupied while I’m really cleaning.  
+24 votes
by (5.3k points)
Yes, $20 a week. No chores yet. You know Isaiah isn’t 4 yet though so I don’t really think he gets the concept of money lol He’s just excited to go put it in his piggy. Trying to teach him savings, just started after xmas. We’ll start taking a little out when it’s someone specials birthday so he can go and pick his own gift and occasions like that, he loves being my shopping buddy!  
+7 votes
by (4k points)
Yes. And we go to the bank to make deposits. He puts away the silverware from the dishwasher, cleans the toilet *he* pees on, and helps me put away laundry. Usually I give him a buck or 2. Or a handful of change and he sorts it into his bank. Then when we go to the bank, I'll hand him a 20 to add to his stack of cash.  
+10 votes
by (4k points)
We started in 2nd grade but chores are not connected to allowance in our house. Chores are expected as being part of our home . Extra chores sometimes get bonuses though .  
+16 votes
by (3.9k points)
No $ for chores. Extra opportunities for earning
+27 votes
by (2.3k points)
We don't give either kid allowance (3 & 9). Their life is their allowance. Every sport, toy, activity, vacation, etc. is their allowance. We're mean parents and have made it clear from day one that if they don't want to help with dishes then they don't deserve to eat. Everyone chips in.  
by (8.9k points)
@laminitis8302 don’t deserve to eat? Wow. I thought I was mean.  
by (2.3k points)
@sulfapyridine I mean, we've never had to withhold food anyways since they know we're serious. Same with clothes. You want to wear clean underwear? Better wash your damn clothes then. I'm big on personal responsibility and natural consequences.  
by (8.9k points)
@laminitis8302 your 3 year old washes his clothes? If so, that’s awesome. LOL
by (2.3k points)
@sulfapyridine he loads and swaps to the drier! He can't reach to put everything away himself yet. Soon, though. I haven't done any of my nine year old's laundry in at least five years, except for the occasional thing that got mixed in with mine.  
+31 votes
by (4.5k points)
When my son was 4 he didn’t get an allowance, but I did have him do easy chores like picking up his toys, helping with laundry, using the handheld vacuum to vacuum the stairs or around baseboards, and helping to feed the dogs. He’s 9 1/2 now and gets an allowance, but has more chores to do in order to earn his allowance.  
+3 votes
by (420 points)
We have jobs that are tied to specific dollar amounts on a central job board, some “chores” are just expected as being a member of the household, these are above and beyond. I decide what is up for the taking when. You do job X you make this much, you do job Y you make that much. Every week or 2 (honestly depending on what was earned) they have a payday. Then, 70% is in a spend back, 20% in a save bank and 10% in a give bank. We just started this year so haven’t fully decided what give or save will go toward but I was thinking gift donations for angel tree for give and large future purchases like a laptop, cell phone, car, etc. years down the road for save.  
+15 votes
by (4.2k points)
No money for chores (they are expected to do things as members of our household) BUT they get some money here and there so they can learn money management.  
+28 votes
by (560 points)
We give our daughter 1 penny to feed our dog in the morning and to let him outside. She sometimes will ask for the penny and does it without expectation. Its excitement to add to her piggy bank. Shes 4.  
+11 votes
by (6.1k points)
Yes my 4 and 3 yr old do chores and no I dont give them any money nor my older children. I give them a roof food and clothes.  
+33 votes
by (5.9k points)
No I never gave my 4 year old an allowance. Why do they need one? They are 4
by (3.8k points)
@subalternate so they can start learning the value of money and saving for toys they want.  
by (2.2k points)
@subalternate I think it’s less about “needing” money to do chores and more about learning life skills. I was never taught how to manage money as a kid and have had to struggle to teach myself as an adult, this is why I feel that it benefits my 4 year old! I also think it’s important for kids to learn the value of the things they want.  
+39 votes
by (8.6k points)
Never gave my 4 year old allowance, but she did have small chores. Help wipe down table after all meals. Put away their toys after playtime. Help fold her socks and underwear. ( my daughter also love to help hang her shirts up on hangers) She also liked to try and help sweep the floors.  
+32 votes
by (6.8k points)
An allowance at 4? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
+34 votes
by (2.4k points)
I do not give mine an allowance yet, however I just paid him for the first time for picking up sticks in the yard. He wanted an expensive costume so I told him he can earn money to buy it. He did!  
+2 votes
by (790 points)
Absolutely not.  
+3 votes
by (8.4k points)
No allowance til like 3rd grade and it is based on special chores, not everyday house helping.  
+31 votes
by (1.7k points)
I don’t give allowance for any age unless it is above and beyond. Painting a room, cutting the grass, baby sitting while we have our monthly date night. Even then, I don’t pay much. Chores in my home for 4 children ( ages 4-16) are a part of life. I start them young also. By 2 they are required to put away toys, put dirty clothes in hampers, move their cup and plate to the counter from the table, empty waste baskets on garbage day. They can do it. You would be surprised what your children can do. Chores in my belief are for them to learn skills and understanding that they need to take care of what they own. I do 90% of the work still because if you think they clean well, they don’t. But still need to learn how to do it. By the time they are in high school, they have learned how to cook basics, do laundry, clean the entire house. Once again, I don’t have them do everything while I sit down but they have weekly chores to ensure they are contributing to the house in general. They won’t just magically know what to do when they are 18. With 7 people and two dogs plus three fish tanks, there is a lot to do here daily.  
+35 votes
by (830 points)
My son is too young (2 yrs), but we have a piggy bank and any money (small bills) my son receives from cards or holidays we’ve started to put into the piggy bank. Also any change I have ☺️
+30 votes
by (1.9k points)
My 4 year old has chores, she cleans her toy room, and living room and set up the table. I don’t physically give her allowance but put a tally up on our board. At the end of the month, she gets to pick a toy of her choice and uses her chore money.  
+29 votes
by (2.9k points)
I never ever got an allowance growing up nor did my husband. So I don't plan to with my kid(s). Now if they say, "Hey mom, can I wash the car for some cash? " I will take them up on it as I would do that for family members growing up.  
+16 votes
by (790 points)
We did chores: help set the table. put out placemats/spoons/knives (dull), getting the mail/newspaper, just general helping out when he would do something extremely helpful. If he wanted something he could save up his chore money to get it.  
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