Day #9 (version 3.0) of the Sarah is trying to kill me diet.

Question

Day #9 (version 3.  0) of the @aftmost is trying to kill me diet.Day #9 (version 3. 0) of the @aftmost is trying to kill me diet. A few hours late. Sorry. we had family over and I was tired . Just didn’t want anyone to think @aftmost finished me off just yet. I have found a loophole in the IPA system! So if something has 5 carbs and 5 grams of fiber, it’s subtracted to 0 net carbs, right? Well miracle noodles have zero calories, zero fat and only 1 carb BUT, 2 grams of fiber. Therefore if math serves me correctly, that’s -1 carb. If I eat 45 servings of these a day, that in essence is taking all my carbs into the negative and I am allowed to eat an entire pizza. I know that @dickens26 will call bullshit on this immediately, but the math doesn’t lie. Hehehe. Day #9 recap 1. Miracle noodles are awesome if you can get past the texture (think eating rubber bands) 2. I crested the 15lb mark. 3. Smoked pork loin was possibly the best thing Ive eaten in a long time. 4. Something has happened to my brain that when I smell broccoli and cauliflower cooking, I immediately salivate. 5. I dislike broccoli and cauliflower but eat it a lot. 6. I’ve been fantasizing about phasing off since day #1 7. 600-800 calories a day is both sadistic and fun to achieve. Happy starvation! -@blunger4

Answer 1

Please keep these post coming! Hilarious  

Answer 2

No. you cannot have pizza. Waiting for @dickens26 to call BS.  

Comments

@aftmost maybe she hasn’t responded because I broke the IPA codebook and sirens are flashing at her house and she is burning all of her books like an IPA spy network would?  

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@blunger4 hush. I think your brain has ceased to function due to low caloric intake.  

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@blunger4 or ordering a pizza

Answer 3

You’re spot on with the miracle noodles description! I have to cut them really small so there’s little chewing involved  

Answer 4

I’m a miracle noodle fan. I do wash them well. Using kitchen scissors I cut them in what looks like small speg size (2-3 inches ). I use an IP approved pasta sauce add peppers, garlic, fresh basil, celery, mushrooms. (If I’m short on daily veggies I add slices of yellow squash or zucchini) All this cooked and added to the sauce topped with measured meatballs over the faux  noodles- Not bad! In fact, really good and packs for lunch well. In maintenance I cover with fresh Parmesan.  

Answer 5

Math does not lie! LOL love this!  

Answer 6

Haha! The math doesn’t lie lol! But maybe a homemade cauliflower crust pizza IPA creation lol

Answer 7

I love the Konjac noodles I get here too just wondering if I could tolerate them cold? I added the rice shaped ones to my turkey/broccoli soup and it was amazing!  

Comments

And. I was wondering the same thing about the negative carb effect lol

Answer 8

I like your pizza math! Lol!  

Answer 9

My husband and I have been talking about pizza all day. I typically read your posts to him. I better skip today. This is definitely some math he could get behind.  

Comments

@nace0 I have been thinking about thin crust pizza.  

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@fallon3509 Us too. That's our favorite. Thin, crispy crust.  

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@fallon3509 But, we got this. And you've got this.  

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@nace0 yes, and that’s why I find good recipes and satisfying food! Keep up the good work.  

Answer 10

If you cook the noodles with you sauce or broth they take on that same flavor. but yes rinse rinse and rinse them! We eat them all the time

Answer 11

Do they come in “rice” size version? And if so has anyone made stuffed cabbage with them?  

Comments

@willing69 they come in angel hair and spaghetti thicknesses as well. So, with a kitchen knife and some time, anything is possible.  

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@willing69 excuse his sarcasm. Yes. there is a rice version. He has no manners and I have a difficult time with him on public forums.  

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@aftmost really there is a rice version? Wtf? Why didn’t you tell me that I would’ve ordered that also honey.  

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Don’t curse at me. Look on amazon and see if they sell the rice. You are a mess.  

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Yes they are on amazon. Miracle Rice.  

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@aftmost just ordered two boxes.  

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@willing69 The frozen green giant cauliflower rice at Superstore tastes pretty good. Tastes real. Keto friendly.  

Answer 12

You wish

Answer 13

#6 is the best  

Comments

@tensiometer That one had me rolling too!  

Answer 14

I love your posts! Keep up the good work!