Question

Today it happened; a day I've been dreading I knew would eventually happen - I briefly lost my toddler while shopping. Fortunately, she was found minutes (that felt like milenia) later. It all happened faster than I could've possibly imagined, one moment she was standing next to me while I went to hang up a shirt, the next she was gone. Before everyone jumps down my throat about not having her restrained, it's kind of terrible with her, she screams when shes buckled into a stroller or shopping cart. I'm particularly concerned about this because we will be soon flying to Florida and traveling through airports and theme parks- that said I'll need to someone need to keep my wild child from running away. Are harnesses horrible? Will people look at me like I'm a monster?  

Answer 1

I am not a "harness your kid mom. " My oldest would wander off, or not come along when I told her. After two controlled environment separations (I could see her but she couldn't see me) we did not have an issue with her staying with me any longer. <she might need therapy but so far so good. she's 19 now. > Trust your instincts on what fits your parenting style and your kid's personality and is at the level of safety you feel comfortable with.  

Answer 2

I would never judge a parent who has their child on a harness made for their safety. Why judge a parent for being safe rather than sorry? The harness still allows the child to roam, just alerting the parent at all times as to where he/she is.  

Answer 3

They were made for a reason! Your child is not the first to hate being strapped in and would rather run around! Use one and save yourself the stress!  

Answer 4

Whatever you need to keep your child safe and you calm! Most people will applaud you!  

Answer 5

Don’t pay any attention to anyone judging. Safety is #1! I used a backpack leash when my now 12 yo was a toddler and to be honest, my small for his age 9 yo goes in the shopping cart many times because he has autism and I don’t give a shit what any judgy moms might think. He prefers it in crowded places and so do I.  

Answer 6

We have harnesses for our twins. We get both negative and positive comments. Mostly positive. In the end it’s about you knowing where your kids are and that they are safe! Yes, you’ll probably hear “it’s a kid, not a dog! ” More than once but let it roll off your back. Your child is safe by your side.  

Answer 7

Leash her. I used a dog collar around her waist, and a regular leash, because mine liked to bolt out of the car seat and run into traffic, so I needed something that could be on her in the car seat. There was a period of about 4 months when she was really fast, thought running away was hilarious, and “no! ” meant “do it more and faster! ” Anyone who is judging you for it 1) will not be paying for the funeral and 2) probably hasn’t had a kid, much less a runner.  

Answer 8

Responsible owners keep their dogs on a leash, so responsible parents do what they need to do to keep their children safe. GO FOR IT! Who cares, it's piece of mind!  

Answer 9

Do what you must to keep your child safe. This is my worst fear for it only take a split second. I expressed this to my son and his wife, with a 3, 5 and 9 mo. Evil folks are snatching kids and they working in pairs. One get your attention and one coming up behind you and snatch.  

Answer 10

Write her name and your number on her arm and use liquid bandage over in case she wanders off. My friend showed me that.  

Answer 11

I just bought one myself for my 3 year old. It’s too scary! Plus what people think about you is none of your business! You know why your doing it! You’re a good mom! Rock the leash! ❤️

Answer 12

Whatever works for you, we all have experienced this at s ok me point. To the harness, as l recently saw at the airport, it honestly looked weird, girl restrained on 2m leash and people do stare. Rather than this option l would practise with her on staying close, holding hand, basic safety if she would get lost bcs that is what she needs to learn and use on daily basis. Also, make an bracelet or write your phone # on her wrist!  

Answer 13

People will look at you and judge you regardless of what you do. Do what works for your family. ❤️

Answer 14

Stop caring about what others think and care about what’s best for you and your family. Nobody’s opinion counts except yours.  

Answer 15

Get the cute little skip hop harness backpack! Do what makes you feel most comfortable!  

Answer 16

I used a leash type thing on my son before. Who cares. Do what you need to do!  

Answer 17

Hey whatever it takes to protect the babes

Answer 18

I had a runner. Use one of the harness backpacks or find an umbrella stroller you can strap her into. My son was also a mini-Houdini. We took him through the airport using a Maclaren umbrella stroller tightened to the max! I checked it at the gate. I think I tried using a sling and wearing him on my hip for a bit too. My son was so active that the harness became a hazard. He happened to be incredibly happy when carried on my husband's shoulders, so sometimes we did that as well. Oh and my son was never distracted by treats. He'd only eat if truly hungry. I couldn't count on a novel toy in a busy place like an airport. Do whatever works to keep your little one safe while traveling. Do not worry what others think if you use a harness.  

Answer 19

I lost my non-runner son at Disney, so do whatever makes you feel safe.  

Answer 20

You do what you need to do to keep your kid safe, and you sane! Who gives a flying F what others think! My son is autistic and people stare like you would not believe- but until they have walked a day in your shoes- WHO GIVES A S#*+ WHAT THEY THINK! Good luck!  

Answer 21

I said I would never use a harness. until I met my second child. He didn’t mind wearing his little backpack, and it gave me peace of mind. Also, for Disney- take a full length picture of your child(ren) each day. That way if they do get lost, you have a current picture and won’t have to think about what they were wearing.  

Answer 22

For me this product along with a harness was a lifesaver when we traveled. Keep your little one safe! That’s all that counts.  
https://www.gogobabyz.com

Answer 23

Saw toddler harnesses galore at Disney. Also saw a lost toddler(he was soon happily reunited with his parents). So-I’d rather see the harness. My son doesn’t like his stroller but I can’t 1. ) catch him if he runs 2. )hold him anymore. It literally takes his two older sisters to try and herd him closer to me-then I intercept and put him back into his stroller. We are not going to Disney next year since he’ll likely be a 40-50 lb 3 year old who can outrun his sisters/mom/dad. I understand now how football players get to where they play pro. They start as a toddler like my son, nonstop running the ball while getting chased.  

Answer 24

Please don’t beat yourself up- it happens. I remember the first time I lost my kid in the library and lost my mind. My hub lost her in a Target and I lost her again in a TJ Maxx. It’s awful and why I think harnesses are just fine!  

Answer 25

My son Had to wear a harness backpack bc he was the worst. They make cute animal ones that are fun to wear. If it makes you feel safer do it, don’t worry about what other people think. Your sanity and your kids safety are worth it.  

Answer 26

Your safety and sanity are important. I'm the mom who has carried screaming crying toddlers out of Target surfboard style. Do what you gotta do. Strollers/carts/harnesses whatever keeps them safe and you sane!  

Answer 27

My daughter is 4 and we are going to Disney next month. I am already scared I will lose her. She just would run away from us. I am not sure what to do. We will have her most of the time in stroller but she will want to walk too.  

Answer 28

Been there mama! No judgement! Practice with a stroller even unbuckled! If she doesn’t throw a fit or get out, offer a small reward once you get out of a store! It took a while but once they know it’s not an option it makes it so much easier!  

Answer 29

I think I will get this one for my daughter and I don't care about what people think. I used to have a "leash" for my son and even took overseas. I didn't care. My children stay close to me, especially around a ton of people

Comments

@minor Altmann this is not as safe a a harness style bc of the child pulls away at the same time you might, easy to dislocate elbow.  

Answer 30

Nothing wrong with it. When I was in college I used to work for a toy store in a mall. We sold these rainbow kid “leashes”. You’d never believe how many we sold to parents who were trying to shop and stay sane. I once watched two families get off the mall elevator and enter the very crowded food court. One child got distracted and got left behind. Parents had no idea, I took the little girl by the hand and weaved my way through the crowd to catch up with them. They had no idea she was still hanging out by the elevator. Harness, stroller, leash, whatever works!  

Answer 31

Once my son took off while I was hanging up pants at a department store (same thing - there one second then gone! ) They had to call a code Adam and he was found in the lingerie department I got a monkey backpack where the tail was the leash after that. He was not a huge fan of it, but it worked!  

Answer 32

Who gives a flying fu*k what anyone would think! Whether it be your child is screaming because she is belted into a stroller/cart or wearing tethered backpack. Her safety is the priority. I'm a single mom with a 4. 5yr old and 20mo old twins. My oldest isn't given an option at the store. She is in the cart. Period. My 20mo old are always in a cart or a stroller. There is no way I could be running after 2 in different directions. Even before the twins, I had a tethered ladybug backpack for my oldest. She loved it! My twins have bumblebee tethered backpacks for the rare occassion I can't bring a stroller somewhere (ex. the dolphin show at the zoo. ) I was given the eyebrow by some mommy friends the first time my daughter wore it at an outing. That is until one of their kids took off running into a building solo with mom quite a distance behind.  You can bet your booty the moms were asking where i got it by the end of the day! Lolol Unapologetically safety first.  

Answer 33

Do not for a second worry about what judgement you may receive for doing what you think is best.  

Answer 34

I used harnesses on my twins. They got to walk and I knew they were safe.  

Answer 35

My daughter was a runner when she was little too. Thought it was hilarious to hide under clothing racks. After I lost her for a few long minutes at KMart, I bought a harness. She hated it so much that, after a while, the threat of it was enough to keep her close to me and I just carried it in my purse. Her two year old daughter is a runner too. When we went to Italy last summer, my daughter wrote her phone number on her daughter’s arm with a sharpie and wore her when we were walking in airports. I imagine that the people who are most critical of harnesses are also the first to condemn someone whose child runs off in a public place. Nuts to them!  

Answer 36

It happens, doll! My son used to climb out of strollers if I stopped to look at anything! He did it so quietly! He also snuck out of our home thru the patio & again quietly Shute it, to cross a fairly busy street to see the water fountain at 2yrs old! ⛲️ You are not a bad Momma at all & happy it worked out well!  

Answer 37

Who cares what people think. you do what you feel you need to do to keep your child safe

Answer 38

Do what you need to do to keep your child safe, period.  

Answer 39

It’s happened to all of us at one time or other - don’t stress about it, just do your best and have a 2nd and 3rd pair of eyes on her! As for the cart/stroller - I never gave my youngest a choice not to be in one. She was not always happy but we knew where she was. Hope you have a fabulous trip!  

Answer 40

So the ONLY issue I have with people using the backpack leashes is when they let the kid cut people off. We were is Disney and I can’t tell you how many times I almost tripped over a kid because their parent is holding onto their leash and still 10 feet away but the kid is wandering all over. If it’s kinda crowded, opt for something else, so no one trips over your kid.  

Answer 41

My kids screamed and kicked in the stroller to. I made them sit in it at the airport and also in the theme park. When we got to the park they weren’t so bad because they were distracted by everything around them. Do what you think is best. Good luck and have fun.  

Answer 42

My daughter likes to wander off. She’s is super independent and hates sitting in the stroller or cart. I bought her a back pack with the leash and she obsessed with the backpack. If she doesn’t want me using the leash she knows I have to hold her hand. I get looks all the time but I try to block it. I’m giving my 2 year old that “independence” she wants but still holding on to her.  

Answer 43

You can use a harness. Don’t let anyone tell you how to parent when you are looking out for your child’s safety. You can’t make everyone else happy!  

Answer 44

Do what you have to do. And have fun!  

Answer 45

Playing I-spy while grocery shopping helps the lil humans stay focused. Start at a gas station and see how she does. Keep her away from sugar at all times, I noticed kids get into mischief when hyper or coming down the sugar high.  

Answer 46

Use the wrist harness! Better safe than sorry. Let any dirty looks or judgement roll off your back like water on a duck.  

Answer 47

So I lost my daughter at the fair. I was screaming for her and she was ten feet away. So now when I go in somewhere I explain my feelings of losing her and she is much better now

Comments

Ps I have the baby jogger stroller. It has a tray that clicks in. It’s not a restraint harness but it helps keep her in a little easier. We take our stroller everywhere

Answer 48

My kids were not runners, so I can’t speak of harnesses other than to say that when I see a parent using one, I assume the child is an escape artist! So no judgment, and I’m sure most folks either get it, too, or don’t even notice. And besides, you know your child and don’t need to worry about the opinions of others in this case. If you’re using a stroller at Disney, make sure it fits within their size guidelines. And one thing we did do when ours were little - just in case - we put our contact info on paper cards and tucked them into their shoes and pockets. Best of luck to you!  

Answer 49

I’d look at you and say, “That kid’s a runner and that momma just wants her baby safe. ” I held onto my kids the entire time we were in the airport or did “kid checks” constantly! And mine are old enough not to run away. I can’t imagine what you must be feeling. You do what you need to feel safe with your kid and forget what others think. Better safe that sorry!  

Answer 50

Shoot my mom used to have this bungee cord tied around her wrist and mine so if I started to walk away it would pull on her wrist and she knew. My ADD would run wild and would want to drift. I pro harness

Answer 51

You do what’s best for your family AND your sanity. Parenting is hard, don’t let the worrying of other ppls judgements make it harder. People always have something to say anyway

Answer 52

Guys I did it. She actually really likes it so far and it gives me piece of mind  

Answer 53

Using a harness for small kids is normal in Europe. Safety comes first and peace of mind. I stopped caring what peeps think years ago. Dont care what peeps think ❤️